I Want You

LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, gather round and summon your courage, for you are on the precipice of an experience you won't soon forget! An entertainment spectacle not suited for children, the elderly, pregnant women or Nickelback fans! In the sewers and back alleys of Allston Rock City potent and perverted musical forces have given birth to a Monster... an EIGHT-HEADED FREAK (see fig. 1) that has a long and sordid history of savage attacks on the cliches of American Popular Music. Spewing half-digested remnants of metal riffage, bebop licks, and soul grooves, the Beast is as unpredictable as It is ugly. Local residents must remain on their guard, for It is known to seduce It's listeners with soothing siren songs, catchy melodies, and danceable grooves, only to viciously and suddenly attack the eardrums with bile-spewing FREE JAZZ and MATH ROCK MELTDOWNS. Rumored to have nurtured Itself on wastewater flowing from prominent local Music Institutions, the Monster has acquired a voracious appetite for new genres to dismember and new crowds to shock and entertain. Hear Ye, Hear Ye! In the grand tradition of luminous musical freak shows such as ZAPPA and the MOTHERS, CHARLES MINGUS, and MR. BUNGLE, I present... The electrifying, the terrifying, the horrible.... Strange Changes!!!